Enjoy our team's carefully selected Viola Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
How is a viola different from an onion?
No one cries when you cut up a viola.
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What did the violin say when it finally played the music correctly?
Viola.
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How do you keep a violin from being stolen?
Put it in a viola case.
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How many viola players does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They canβt reach that high.
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Whatβs the difference between a viola and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off before jumping on a trampoline.
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My wife stopped me on the way out the door with my viola case in hand.
Wife: βWhere do you think youβre going?β
Me: βI got a gig.β
Wife: βA gig? I thought all your gigs got canceled?β
Me: βI got a new one.β
Wife: βWho hires a violist when weβre all quarantined?β
Me: βThe health department. They want me to walk down the street playing my viola to get everyone to run inside and shut their windows.β
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How does a viola greet a relative?
Cello!
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What is the difference between a violin and a viola?
A viola burns longer.
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A viola player goes into a music shop.
The shop assistant asks what he would like.
The viola player says, βWell, Iβve been playing the viola for years and Iβm getting really tired of everyone pointing and laughing and acting like I donβt know the first thing about music, so Iβm thinking about taking up another instrument.β
βDo you know what youβd like to play?β asks the assistant.
The viola player says, βIβm not sure yet. Is it all right if I have a look around for a while?β
Of course the assistant says that would be just fine.
So after ten minutes or so the viola player comes up to the desk and says, βI think Iβve made my decision. Iβd like to buy the bagpipes you have by the door, and the big white accordion.β
The assistant says, βLet me just go and see the manager.β He goes and sees the manager.
He comes back and says, βThe manager says you can have the fire extinguisher for Β£49.99, but the radiatorβs not for sale.β
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