Enjoy our team's carefully selected Song Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
What’s a hairdresser’s favorite Christmas song?
“Oh, comb all ye faithful...”
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Why don’t Alpacas like singing with background music?
They prefer to sing alpacapella.
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What do you call a lawyer who sings?
An opera attorney.
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What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day?
God save the kin.
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Why did Taylor Swift bring a broken leg to her concert?
Because it wanted to experience firsthand the “break-up” songs she’s famous for.
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What’s a blueberry’s favorite song?
Anything from the Blue Album by Weezer.
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How do you make a recipe pop with ginger?
Play Spice Girls songs while you cook.
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I have started carrying a piece of stone with me to throw at people who sing Christmas songs before Thanksgiving.
It’s my jingle bell rock.
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How does Lady Gaga like her sushi?
Ra-ra-raw-raw Ra-ra-raw-raw.
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Dear Justin Bieber haters, please respect him.
I owe my life to Justin.
Last August 16, 2014, I was in a coma for 4 months due to a terrible car accident. One day, my nurse turned the radio to Justin’s song.
So I got up... and turned off the radio.
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How many songs do you need to write if you really want to make some money with them?
Four tunes.
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My doctor warned me that constantly singing Frank Sinatra songs was bad for my health, but I just wouldn’t listen.
And now, the end is near.
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Avril Lavigne could have just called her song Skater boy instead of Sk8er Boi.
Why’d you have to go and make things so complicated?
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Do songbirds get mad at hummingbirds...
Because they don’t know the words.
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Who is Santa’s favorite singer?
Elf-is Presley.
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What kind of songs do aliens listen to?
Neptunes!
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NASA has finally announced what would have happened to the earth if the moon wasn’t present.
50% less poems and love songs.
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What’s the National Donut Day theme song?
“Donut Stop Believing”.
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A woman comes from a restaurant and ate a lot of beans.
When she gets home, his husband puts a blindfold on hair and says not to take it off.
The lady hears her husband leave the room and starts farting really loudly.
When the husband comes back and takes off the blindfold the lady sees 12 people with pegs on their noses singing “Happy birthday!”.
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I was in a Starbucks Coffee recently when my stomach started rumbling and I realized that I desperately needed to fart.
The place was packed, but the music was really loud so to get relief and reduce embarrassment I timed my farts to the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs I started to feel much better.
I finished my coffee and noticed that everyone was staring at me.
I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod (with earpiece).
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Reverend Clive Morgan was completing his homily in St John’s Church about the dangers of alcohol and the need for moderation and temperance.
He announced at the end of the sermon in a loud, clear voice, “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river.”
With even greater emphasis he added, “And if I had all the wine in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river.”
Finally, he intoned in an extremely serious manner, “And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river.”
The Reverend Morgan then sat down.
Jerry, St John’s leading chorister stood up and announced with a smile, “For our closing hymn this Sunday, let us sing together hymn number 109: Shall We Gather at the River.”
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Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera.
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