Enjoy our team's carefully selected Jokes on Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
Who tells the best egg jokes?
Comedi-hens.
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Why are orange jokes so dumb?
Because oranges are afraid to concentrate.
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What did the father squirrel tell his son?
Acorny joke.
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What do you call a half-baked joke?
A pun in the oven.
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When Chuck Norris tells a joke about Will Smith’s wife, Will Smith slaps himself.
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There are no jokes about Chuck Norris.
It’s all true.
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Knock! Knock!
“Who’s there?”
“Lenny.”
“Lenny, who?”
“Lenny know when you’re done with these April Fools’ Day jokes.”
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Knock! Knock!
“Who’s there?”
“Sofa.”
“Sofa, who?”
“Sofa these have been pretty good April Fools’ jokes.”
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Knock! Knock!
“Who’s there?”
“Water.”
“Water, who?”
“Water you doing telling Halloween jokes right now? Don’t you have things to do?”
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Knock! Knock!
“Who’s there?”
“Narwhal.”
“Narwhal, who?”
“I narwhal the best knock knock jokes! Do you wanna hear some more?”
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I tried to post a Thanksgiving joke about turkeys.
But it was removed because of fowl language.
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My family asked me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes.
I told them I couldn’t stop cold turkey.
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Why do some people not like a Thanksgiving joke about turkeys?
Because of fowl language.
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Joke’s on you, April Fools’ Day.
I can be fooled any day of the year.
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You should know that no one understood it was an April Fools’ joke.
No one expected you to have a sense of humor.
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Why does Batman hate April Fools’ Day?
Because the Joker might be out!
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What monster plays the most April Fools’ jokes?
Prankenstein!
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I have a joke about the flu...
But I hope you don’t get it.
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As a doctor, I feel uncomfortable making jokes about people who refuse to take flu vaccines.
But let me give it a shot.
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What do you get when you mix a motorbike with a joke?
A Yamahaha.
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I try to avoid making nun jokes, but it’s a farce of habit.
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One night, a blonde nun was praying in her room when God appeared before her.
“My daughter, you have pleased me greatly. Your heart is full of love for your fellow creatures, and your actions and prayers are always for the benefit of others. I have come to you, not only to thank and commend you, but to grant you anything you wish,” said God.
“Dear Heavenly Father, I am perfectly happy, and I am doing what I love. I lack for nothing. I feel content in all ways,” said the nun.
“There must be something you would have of me,” said God.
“Well, there is one thing,” she said.
“Just name it,” said God.
“It’s those blond jokes. They are so demeaning to blondes everywhere, not just to me. I would like for blond jokes to stop.”
“Consider it done,” said God. “Blonde jokes shall be stricken from the minds of humans everywhere. But surely there is something that I could do just for you.”
“There is one thing. But it’s really small, and not worth your time,” said the nun.
“Name it. Please,” said God.
“It’s the M&M’s,” said the nun. “They’re so hard to peel.”
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I read a joke about colors once.
It blue my mind.
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Why do people love blue jokes?
They’re so pun-derful.
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My orthopedic surgeon has the bone-dacity to tell jokes during surgery.
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I met a comedian who specializes in Uranus jokes.
Suffice to say, their humor was out of this world.
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I asked Uranus if it knows any good planet jokes.
It replied, “Sorry, they’re just not my atmosphere.”
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I’m not afraid to crack a joke about Uranus.
It’s a gas!
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My teacher told me I couldn’t make a joke about Uranus in class.
But hey, it’s my orbit!
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I tried to tell a joke about Uranus.
But I couldn’t planet right.
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My wife has banned me from making any more breakfast puns.
She says if I make anymore, I’m toast.
But my kids keep egging me on.
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Who told the most jokes among the colonists?
Punsylvanians.
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My boss fired me for making too many Asian jokes.
It was the end of my Korea.
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Where does The Joker get his hair done?
Arkham Hairstylum.
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I figured out the ending of Joker.
It’s the names of the people who worked on the movie.
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If Joker and Harley Quinn have a son.
The name is Joaquin.
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The new Joker went to see a doctor for his mental health, but didn’t make an appointment.
It was a Joaquin.
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When Batman is investigating a crime, the most likely explanation is that the Joker did it.
That’s Arkham’s Razor.
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I heard The Joker just accidentally killed someone.
He was convicted of involuntary man’s laughter.
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What drink does the Joker hate?
Societea.
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Why did The Joker have to sleep with his lights on?
Because he was afraid of the Dark Knight.
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Why did the chicken stop crossing the road?
It got tired of all the jokes.
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What is Spider-Man’s favorite part of the joke?
The punch line!
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I told a joke over a Zoom meeting...
...it wasn’t even remotely funny.
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Batman goes to a party. To his surprise, he sees that the Joker is there too.
“He must be up to something,” he thinks. And so he sneaks up behind him, knocks him out, and puts him in a back room.
When walks out, he sees the Joker again.
“How did he recover so quickly?” Once again he knocks him out and puts him in the back room.
Coming out a third time, he sees the Joker yet again.
“How can this be?!” Now furious, Batman confronts him, grabs him by his vest, and shouts, “What are you doing here, Joker?!”
And he replies, “I’m enjoying this Halloween party, dude!”
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My girlfriend said I’m starting to annoy her because I relate everything to Batman.
What a Joker.
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An onion just told me a joke.
I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.
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Came home and found my wife in bed and told her a joke.
It was so funny even the guy under the bed laughed.
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Me: “I’m not able to stop making jokes.”
Doctor: “You can’t be serious.”
Me: “That’s right.”
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On my tombstone, please write “Not appreciating my puns was a grave mistake.”
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I have a feeling my dying words will be “Honey, I was just joking.”
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I said to my wife, “Did you hear my last pun?”
She replied, “I hope so!”
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Last night, I changed a light bulb, crossed a road, walked into a bar and chatted with an Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman.
That’s when I realized my entire life is a joke...
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I know a lot of jokes in sign language and I guarantee you that no one has ever heard them.
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I hate explaining my own jokes. Mostly because I don’t get them either.
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A newcomer observes the inmates telling political jokes.
All the jokes are by now so deeply familiar that they simply refer to them by number.
“Forty-three,” says one. General hilarity.
“Two hundred and three”, says a second. Appreciative chuckles.
“Three hundred and twenty-nine,” says a third.
The newcomer decides to try his hand.
“Ninety-one”, he ventures. Total silence.
He tries again, “Three hundred and one.” Not a titter.
“Forty-two.” A deadly hush.
Puzzled, he asks his neighbor what he did wrong.
“Nothing,” he says. “It’s just the way you tell them.”
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What do you do when no one laughs at your science jokes?
Keep trying until you get a reaction.
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Why shouldn’t you tell an egg a joke?
Because it might crack up!
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How does every racist joke start?
By looking over your shoulder!
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Bula decides it’s time to become a businessman, so after reading many chicken jokes, it seems like a chicken farm would be the best idea.
Said and done. First, buy 100 chickens, after the second month another 100, and keep it for a whole year.
After a year, at the New Year’s Eve party, he meets Johnny, who used to say the best chicken jokes before.
Johnny: “Well, how’s the business going?”
Bula: “Bad brother, sorry about everything!”
Johnny: “Why?”
Bula: “I don’t have any chickens anymore!”
Johnny: “Good god, why?”
Bula: “If I know, I think I’m doing something wrong. Either I plant them too deeply or don’t water them enough, but one doesn’t raise the hen.”
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How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
You tell her a joke on Wednesday.
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