Greece Jokes



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Greece Jokes


How is bacon like southern Europe?

Itโ€™s got a lot of Greece in it.

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Did you know the first French Fries werenโ€™t actually cooked in France?

They were cooked in Greece.

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What did Zeus use to make the best fries ever?

Ancient Greece.

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Some years ago, a small rural town in Spain twinned with a similar town in Greece.

The mayor of the Greek town visited the Spanish town.

When he saw the palatial mansion belonging to the Spanish mayor, he wondered how he could afford such a house.

The Spaniard said, โ€œYou see that bridge over there? The EU gave us a grant to build a two-lane bridge, but by building a single-lane bridge with traffic lights at either end, this house could be built.โ€

The following year, the Spaniard visited the Greek town. He was simply amazed at the Greek mayorโ€™s house: gold taps, marble floorsโ€”it was marvelous.

When he asked how this could be afforded, the Greek said, โ€œYou see that bridge over there?โ€

The Spaniard replied, โ€œNo.โ€

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A lot of William Shakespeareโ€™s plays were based on old Greek and Roman performances.

Thatโ€™s playgarism if you ask me.

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Whatโ€™s the best thing about Thanksgiving in Bulgaria?

Bulgaria is next to Turkey and Greece.

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Why donโ€™t the Greeks, Slavs, and Armenians celebrate Thanksgiving?

Because they donโ€™t like Turkey.

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Why was the UN concerned when the waiter dropped Thanksgiving dinner?

Because it meant the fall of turkey, the ruin of grease, and the breakup of china.

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I recently took a trip to learn more about Greek culture and to gain a greater appreciation of their amazing works of art and architecture.

The British Museum is a really cool place.

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No one seems to want to help me look for my missing Greek lettuce.

They keep telling me itโ€™s a lost cos.

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New to the country, and not knowing a word of English, Con the Greek got a job at a fruit stand.

The manager told him, โ€œLook, there are only 3 phrases you need to know:

If they say how much are the mangoes, you say โ€œ$5 a kiloโ€.

If they ask if theyโ€™re ripe, you say โ€œSome are, some arenโ€™tโ€.

If they say they donโ€™t want to buy, you shrug and say โ€œIf you donโ€™t, someone else willโ€.โ€

After many attempts using hand gestures, he is satisfied that Con gets it. So he leaves Con alone to see how he goes on his first day.

The first customer comes in and asks how much the mangoes are.

He says, โ€œFive-a dolla per-a kilo.โ€

The guy asks if they are ripe.

He says, โ€œSumma dey are, Summa dey arenโ€™t.โ€

He says maybe next time.

So Con shrugs and tells him, as instructed, โ€œIf you-a donโ€™t, summabody else will.โ€

The guy shakes his head and leaves.

Later, another customer comes in.

He asks Con for the time.

Con replies, โ€œFive-a dolla per-a kilo.โ€

The guy looks very confused, stares at Con for a few seconds, and then asks him, โ€œIs your whole family crazy like you are?โ€

Con shakes his head and replies, โ€œSumma dey are, Summa dey arenโ€™t.โ€

The guy is getting pretty angry by now, thinking Con is playing with him.

The guy says, โ€œSo, do you want me to punch you in the face right now?!โ€

Con shrugs again and says, โ€œIf you-a donโ€™t, summabody else will.โ€

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Where was the first donut cooked?

In Greece.

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