Enjoy our team's carefully selected Bass Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
Our bassist never shows up for practice.
Mostly because he can’t find the key and doesn’t know when to come in.
😄 😄 😄
Our bands bassist was always coming in late. He just couldn’t get the timing right, so we kicked him out of the band.
He got so depressed, he threw himself behind a bus.
😄 😄 😄
How many bassists does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because the keyboard player can do it with his left hand.
😄 😄 😄
What’s the difference between a bassist and god?
God doesn’t think he’s a bassist.
😄 😄 😄
What’s the definition of an optimist?
A bassist player with a mortgage.
😄 😄 😄
What do you call a successful bassist?
A guy whose wife has two jobs.
😄 😄 😄
What do a bass guitar solo and peeing your pants have in common?
It’s quiet and embarrassing.
😄 😄 😄
What’s the difference between a bass guitar and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off before you jump on a trampoline.
😄 😄 😄
What’s the best thing to play a bass guitar with?
A razor blade.
😄 😄 😄
What does a bass guitar and a baseball have in common?
People cheer when you hit them with a bat.
😄 😄 😄
How do you keep your jewelry from being stolen?
Leave it in a bass guitar case.
😄 😄 😄
Guitar tuner: “Hi, I’m here to tune your bass guitar.”
Guy: “I didn’t call a guitar tuner.”
Guitar tuner: “Yeah, I know, but the neighbors called.”
😄 😄 😄
What does a bass guitar and a lawsuit have in common?
Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.
😄 😄 😄
A young child told his mother, “When I grow up I’m going to play the bass guitar.”
His mother responded, “Well, honey, you know you can’t do both.”
😄 😄 😄
How do you get a million dollars?
Start off with 2 million and buy a bass guitar.
😄 😄 😄
What do you call a guitar that’s made of sodium hydroxide?
Base guitar.
😄 😄 😄
What do you call a beautiful woman on a bass player’s arm?
A tattoo.
😄 😄 😄
What do you call a bass player who broke up with his girlfriend?
Homeless.
😄 😄 😄
