Best Jokes (95)



Around 80% of all Asians who move to America get cataracts.

The remaining 20% usually buy chevrorets, rexus or rincoln. Some even get rand lover.

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Remember when you ate a kid’s meal at McDonald’s?

His parents were pissed.

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How do bulls write?

With a bullpen.

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Can you guess what the left eye said to the right eye?

Between you and I, something smells.

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What do you call a Volleyball player who hurt her knee diving for the ball?

Courtney.

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How do you keep a violin from being stolen?

Put it in a viola case.

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What does a bookworm do during a baseball game?

Worm the bench.

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Bird flu.

Bird landed.

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My son identifies as a crescent moon.

I’m worried, but my wife says it’s just a phase.

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Did you know that Uranus is the coldest place in the solar system?

So it’s safe to say the sun doesn’t shine there.

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A dragon would never explode.

But a dino might.

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What did parmesan say when it broke up with mozzarella?

β€œI’m sorry, I’m too mature for you.”

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I don’t like people who do not cover their mouths and noses when they sneeze.

These people make me sick.

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How advanced are the inner workings of a submarine?

It goes very deep.

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Yo mama so fat Cupid’s arrows couldn’t pierce her.

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An electrician is a bright spark who knows what’s watt.

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I don’t want to be Spider-Man, I just want to be your man.

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What is a DnD cleric’s favorite car manufacturer?

Ford, because I’ve never seen a cleric without their focus.

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What do you get when a giant steps on a house?

Mush-rooms.

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Yo momma so fat she can’t reach her back pocket.

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